around this time two years ago, i was on spring break with my two best friends in south carolina. i had just decided to move to tanzania once the school year ended, and i remember lying on the beach trying to imagine what my life would be like a year from that day. two years from that day. it was scary and exciting. so impossible to picture a life so different from the one i was living. but it was something i had dreamed of for a long time, and i was ready.

and it has been both everything and nothing like i expected. i love it here and will always love it here. i love the language, the land, the people. i love the amani kiddos, my coworkers at kpap, and my little group of friends. i love tanzanian coke, tanzanian music, tanzanian phone conversations. i love tying a kanga around my neck and wearing it around the house. i love buying mangoes in the bright, dusty market. i love cooking in the dark and eating with my hands and arguing with the local shopkeeper about the price of sugar.

in so many ways, living in tanzania has been everything i imagined. there's something special about life here that makes me feel so free. and sometimes i feel like i fit here more than i maybe ever will in the united states.

and, yet, there's the not so pretty side of things, too. things i didn't really imagine. like systems of bribery that run so deep that you forget that it's not normal to give the traffic policeman money for soda. like having a hard time forming any sort of real relationships with people without feeling like one day they’ll just leave. like cultural ideals that often put unrealistic expectations on children and then blame them for things that aren't their fault.

and then, of course, there's this one. such a big part of the reason i came here. it's been such a long road, filled with many ups but what sometimes seems like so many more downs. it seemed so perfect when he got placed in a secondary school so close to my house. but as time has passed, i think we've both realized that there's a big difference between a fun pen pal who comes to visit you in the summer and a big sister/mama who makes you follow rules and lectures you when you have bad manners or get in trouble at school for trying to make your uniform more stylish. i had, and still do have, such dreams for that child. and, in many ways, he’s doing remarkably well. but it hasn't been what i imagined.

as always, i’ve been learning so much. so much.

that it’s ok not to be liked all the time.

that changes come slowly, sometimes painfully slowly.

that sometimes we don’t see the fruits of what we’ve worked for, but that doesn’t make the work unimportant.

that life usually doesn’t turn out like we expect it to.

and i think, maybe above everything else, i’m learning that it’s not our job to save anyone. it’s our job to love them and to help them, but we can’t control how things turn out in the end. as much as we push and try and work and fight, in the end the policeman might still be asking for soda money, the mountain guides might still be stealing from porters, the teachers at the school down the street might still be hitting their 2^nd graders with sticks when they don’t know their multiplication tables.

and while none of this is ok, in a way it is. because while it’s important to keep pushing and trying and working and fighting, it’s also important to remember that we’re not doing any saving. there is only One who saves and i’m so very thankful for Him because i don’t know what i’m doing most of the time. and while He’s saving the corrupt politicians and greedy mountain guides and angry teenagers, in His own way and His own time, He’s also saving you and saving me. we are all equally in need of His grace, and none of us deserve it.

on this Easter weekend, i’m so thankful for a God who creates life from death. who, even when things don’t turn out like i expect, makes all things new.

Yesu amefufuka. Amefufuka kweli.

I'm back in Tanzania! And my friend Amy came back with me for a 2-week visit. She's heard probably more than she ever wanted to about Amani and Tanzania since I first came here in 2005, so it was really fun for her to be here and see things for herself. I don't have all of the pics, but here are a few:

at the hot springs

eating kiti moto, one of our favorite local dishes

grinding coffee

amy with one of my coworkers

in marangu, on the slopes of kilimanjaro

asante sana for coming amy! i miss you already, and karibu tena!

I promise I’m still alive! My boss left in early October because her mother is sick back in the US, so things have been busy around here. Thankfully, we are still able to communicate with her via email, and I have some pretty amazing Tanzanian coworkers, so we haven’t gone completely crazy.

A little update on work: we’re in the midst of a month-long low season for Mount Kilimanjaro, so we’ve been teaching classes! We’ve been focusing on organizing classes to teach porters about their rights. Basically, we arrange with the companies to meet with their porters (sometimes 20 show up, sometimes 500!), we teach them about their rights, and then we invite the director in at the end to discuss any issues. It’s been a learning experience, but we’ve had some really great classes these past few weeks. Sometimes I get teary hearing the porters standing up for themselves in front of their company director. Usually they are too afraid that they will lose their jobs to do this on their own, so it’s very rewarding to see the staff of our organization acting as mediators.

A few pictures:





As I’ve mentioned in earlier posts, it’s been an interesting few months for our organization politically, and I’m seeing many sad parts of Tanzanian life that I didn’t realize were there before. It’s depressing to think about how things came to be this way and even more difficult to think about how things will be able to improve.

That being said, there are still many parts of Tanzanian culture that I love. People are generally friendly and kindhearted and willing to go out of their way to help you. Sharing, cooperation, and togetherness are values deeply embedded in the culture that I think we could learn a lot from in America. There are also some quirkier parts of everyday Tanzanian life that I’ve been noticing and loving a lot lately. I thought everyone might enjoy it if I explained some of them here:

1. Pedicures at the bus stand. Most people travel by bus around here, so the bus stand is a pretty hopping spot. The stand is full of people trying to sell lots of stuff-from tickets to snacks to shoes. But my favorite salesmen at the bus stand are young men in the age range of 15-25 who carry around nail files and a basket of nail polish, and for $1, they will give you a complete manicure/pedicure.

2. Text forwards. I think these may have been somewhat popular in the US for awhile, but they have really found their niche in Tanzania. And with the types of texting packages that are available, people can be free to send lots and lots of these forwards without paying extra. Their charm lies in their dramatic abbreviated language and how they make you think you should be able to understand them if only you were a little more philosophical. For example: FWD: Neva think of the past b’z it brings tears n don’t think much of the future b’z it brings fear. Lif is where u a, commitment & self determination ar ze mirror or ur precious upcoming future look 4ward with confidence & backward with gratitude & where u a with hope!”

3. Man Love: This is somewhat related to texting forwards. Homosexuality is technically illegal here, but it is definitely not illegal for a young man to send another young man a text message along the lines of “I miss you and love you so much that I'm going to die,” even if they have just seen each other 5 minutes before.

4. Celine Dion: It’s also not a shameful thing for a man (or woman or child) to truly and deeply love Celine. My 25 year-old taxi driver made a special trip to get a “special” playlist before taking my friend and I to the airport a few days ago. It turned out the playlist was “Falling Into You” in its entirety.

5. Unabashed Requests for Contact Info: On the daladala yesterday, I sat next to a young man. Our conversation went something like this:
young man: How are you?
me: Fine. How are you?
young man: Fine. What is your name?
me: Laura. What is your name?
young man: Emmanuel. May I have your contact so that we can communicate in the future?
me: Ummm…I have to go. Bye!

This is my life, over and over again.

6. Name Confusion: This is another typical conversation:
Tanzanian: What is your name?
me: Laura.
Tanzanian: Flora?
me: no, Laura.
Tanzanian: Glory?
me: no, L-A-U-R-A.
Tanzanian: oohhh, Laura. Like Laura Bush. You look just like her!

7. Waiting in Line: When you go to the store or market here, you just have to elbow your way up to the front. I used to try to wait my turn, but after being passed up too many times, I now cut line without even thinking about it. I’m a little worried how this is going to work out at Target when I’m home for Christmas…

8. Saying No: As a general rule, a Tanzanian will never tell you “no.” Even if something is utterly impossible and both he and you know it, he will tell you not to worry, it will happen “tomorrow” or “another day” or “when there is time.”

9. Buying Vegetables: Another general rule: you most likely won’t get a mama at the market to decrease her price, but you will get her to increase the amount of fruit or vegetables she will give you. For example, maybe you are shopping for oranges. She says she will sell you 5 for 1,000 shillings but refuses to go down to 900 shillings. She will, however, give you 1 or 2 extra oranges for free which makes the per-orange price less than what it would have been if she had decreased it to 900. Ah well.

10. Traveling Pharmacy Salesman: This is maybe my favorite cultural phenomenon. You’re on the bus, and all of the sudden there’s a young businessman up in the front asking for your attention. He proceeds to pull various health and beauty products from a bag, describe them, and explain how they are all being sold for just a fraction of the cost! It’s kind of like the Home Shopping Network but live and in-person, and you’re on a bus so you can’t escape.

11. Chinese Products: Cheap, fake Chinese products are everywhere here, and Tanzanians have a somewhat love-hate relationship with them. They scoff because things are Chinese-made (or “kichina” as they say in Swahili) and will wear out so quickly, but they buy them because they are so cheap. For example, I currently have in my possession 2 pairs of sunglasses (one pair of Dolce and Gabana’s and one pair of Ray-Ban’s) and an Adidas watch. I bought them all for a total of less than $6, and I can almost guarantee you they will all be broken by next month.

12. Burned Movie Collections: In a topic somewhat related to fake Chinese products, “movie collections” are also available on the streets of Moshi. These are basically multiple pirated movies burned onto the same disc and sold for less than $2. For example, there is one collection called “2010 New Movies” that includes When In Rome, Date Night, Remember Me, The Back-Up Plan, etc. Various seasons of "24," "Heroes," "Lost," and "Grey's Anatomy" are also readily available and all on one disc. And as an added twist, many of these movies come with non-removable English and Chinese subtitles. And I don’t know how it happens, but the English subtitles aren’t exactly what the actors are saying—it’s this weird, overly translated version that tries to mean the same thing as what the actors are saying but doesn’t make sense. For example: No, I want to take him to the park” is subtitled as “Do not, I wish bringing it to garden.”

So there are a few hidden gems of Tanzanian culture—I’m sure a Tanzanian living in the US would have many funny things to share about American culture, too. You are all welcome to come visit to experience all of it for yourselves!

Hope everyone is doing well, and I hope to see many of you at Christmas.

I don't have any new news to report, but have I ever mentioned that my sister is really talented and hilarious? Anyone who gets the Hippensteel family Christmas card already knows, but for those who don't, here are some fake news posts that she has written recently (please don't report me for using the onion logo):



Local Resident Surprised by Hardwood Floors
CINCINNATI, OH Catherine McCafferty, resident of Dana Avenue, was shocked last Thursday, when she discovered that her bedroom floor was actually hardwood. Though she moved in about two months ago, the room has stayed in a constant state of moving in, with boxes piled in all nooks and crannies, thus hiding the floor. Said roommate, Rachel Smolen, “At first, I was kind of like yeah, you should clean your room. But then the roach infestation began, and I was honestly just afraid of what she might find if she moved anything.” Though McCafferty refused to comment, sources say that she has referred to her floors as “cozy and carpeted,” and residents of the apartment below claim to have heard her vacuuming at various points during the semester. Caity Burke, who occupies the room directly below McCafferty, specified that “it was one of those heavy duty carpet vacuums, not a dinky little hardwood vacuum.” Burke and Smolen both noted that McCafferty has been handling the shock quite well, and has even purchased a Swiffer to adjust to the hardwood life.

MOSHI, TANZANIA In a surprising turn of events, local resident Laura Hippensteel has nothing to do today. A report from Friday indicates that a friend, Christina, became ill, thus requiring the cancellation of what should have been a weekend of festive fun. Said Hippensteel, "I feel bad for Christina, but I was pretty excited about spending time in her boyfriend's village this weekend. Now I just have my chickens for company." Bordering on pathetic, Hippensteel has begun to analyze the different squawks that her chickens make to occupy her time. Christina, in an exclusive interview that was technically off record, stated that "I'm not really sick. I just didn't want to spend a whole weekend with the kind of person who thinks she's a chicken whisperer. I mean, she's nice and all, but..." After receiving the harsh news that her supposed watermelon plants are actually bean sprouts, the news of a weekend free of activity just might crush poor Hippensteel. "I've almost made it through. I just have a few hours left until work on Monday. I've been counting down since Friday," Hippensteel claimed, in what experts believe to be the first documented account of a working individual wishing the weekend away.

CINCINNATI, OH After extensive testing, the world’s most qualified doctors have declared Xavier student Jenna Hippensteel “a mystery to the entire world of medicine.” Dr. Sven Bjorka, an internationally recognized Swedish rheumatologist added that Hippensteel “shows so many signs of different things, that we really can’t say anything for sure. She has at most two serious illnesses, one life-threatening condition, and three or four minor issues. At the least, she’s healthy as a horse. We just don’t know.” After a CT scan, a colonoscopy, an endoscopy, countless blood tests, various biopsies, and a tuberculosis exam, Hippensteel remains in medical limbo. Gastrointestinal specialist Andrew Jones expressed extreme frustration with the situation. “How can one person be border-line on so many things? I mean seriously, can’t the patient just be sick or not? And it’s not just her health. Even as a person, she’s only kind of interesting. Like when I ask her about her daily habits, her answers are always ‘Sort of,’ ‘I guess,’ or ‘Yeah, maybe.’” Jones concluded the interview with other examples of Hippensteel’s mediocrity that cannot be printed due to HIPAA regulations. In a phone interview, Nancy Hippensteel, mother, compared Jenna with her sister, Laura. “Laura is just so wonderful. She’s athletic, she’s a great teacher, she has the initiative to up and move halfway across the world. And Jenna, well, she’s…interesting. I mean it’s not that she’s bad, she’s just not that good, either. Wait. Don’t print that last part. It’s just that for Jenna, she’s isn’t that good at staying healthy, but she’s also apparently not that good at being sick.” Doctors continue to provide tests and procedures for young Hippensteel, but there seems to be no end in sight. Said Bjorka, “I have lost track of the number of cures I have discovered for various illnesses, as well as the numbers of Nobel Prizes I have been awarded for my outstanding contributions for the field of medicine. But I just cannot figure out this case.” Despite extensive medical attention, Hippensteel, who declined comment, continues to lead a life as run-of-the-mill as before her health troubles, which may be nothing at all.

There have been many festivities lately with the Amani kids, and I've been lucky to get to share in some of the fun.

Last Friday, we celebrated the 7th grade graduation, which is the end of primary school and a big deal in Tanzania. It's always very beautiful to see the kids looking so grown up and happy. It was a fun affair as usual, complete with acrobatics, jumprope, skits, songs, and delicious food. The best part, though, was the dance-off and rap-off at the end. I've never cried at a rap-off before, but when everyone chanted the name of an especially troubled Amani child to encourage him to take the microphone, and then when he started rapping about how Rovina (the nurse) had saved him from the streets, it was really very special.

Yohana receiving a graduation gift:

Standard 7 graduates and their family members:

Standard 7 graduates

On Saturday, Charles, one of the older Amani kids, celebrated his confirmation. And what did he want for his present? A new history book for school. Sometimes these children amaze me. Please also note the fact that Charles is wearing cuff links, which I'm assuming he borrowed from one of the Amani staff.

On Sunday, we went to see Ismaili, another one of the Amani kids, in his weekly gig with his band. Ismail studied dance and music in art school, and now he's doing an internship with this band in Moshi. They like him so much that he's hoping to stay on with them after the internship is over.

Ismaili the one playing the drums.

And here he is singing:

It's been a busy September so far here in Moshi.

Again I won't mention too much about work, other than to say it's pretty busy. I will also say that working with the porters has boosted my self esteem to an all-time high as I am turning down marriage proposals right and left these days. Aside from work, here are some other things that have been going on:

First I have to brag a little bit. If you know me or have been reading this blog for awhile, you know about Baraka who is a child from Amani who has come to be like my little brother over the years. He began secondary school in January, and he was sent to a private (and more expensive) school. In many of the government secondary schools here there aren't enough teachers and there are no books or teaching materials, so many of the students just sit in the classroom all day with no teacher and nothing to do. Seeing that this is a bit unproductive, Amani has started to send some kids (especially those who show promise in academics) to private school. Because Baraka made good grades in primary school, he was a good candidate for private secondary. He got his first grade report back in June, and he brought it to my house to show me on one of the first weekends I was back. He made an "A" average, placed 1st in his class out of 250, and received a scholarship for free tuition this term! I am so very proud, as are the Amani staff. When he went to get some school supplies from Amani a few weeks ago, he accidentally interrupted an education staff meeting and received a round of applause from all of the teachers. It's just so nice to see something going right in a place with so many challenges.

On another note, I've become the proud parent of one rooster and two chickens. I don't know anything about chicken care and should actually probably be using these few hours of electricity to do some internet research, but they seem to be doing ok so far. I do enjoy hanging out with them outside after work, although they don't seem to like me that much.

Yesterday I attended the high school graduation of Regina, one of the older Amani kids. She's been reminding Christina and me about it since April, so we figured we better go. Unfortunately the daladala got stuck on the way, so by the time we made it to her school we were caked in mud, but we were still glad we went. After the ceremony, we were able to visit with Regina and her brothers and sisters and do the tradition Tanzanian feeding of cake to each other.

I've also just been asked to join the board of a small children's home here in Moshi. It's called SWIWSCO and is home to 35 children. It was started by a local farmer, Collins, who at first just welcomed 3 street children into his home. Over time, the number of children has grown, as have the expenses. 35 children now live in a small house in Moshi, and they are struggling financially to provide food and school fees for the children. They are currently registered as an NGO in Tanzania only, but if you would like to support a child, please contact me, or check out their website at http://www.swiwsco.org/. Here are some pictures of the house and kiddos...





I think that's all for now. May our thoughts be with those who lost loved ones on 9/11 and in the Zanzibar ferry tragedy yesterday. Have a nice Sunday, everyone!

Things are moving along out here in Tanzania....if anyone wants to escape the hurricanes, earthquakes etc., come on over! Plus, Ramadhan will be over tomorrow so all my favorite restaurants will be open again. AND, our power cuts are finally on a schedule so at least we know when the outages will be. I guess we can't complain!

Although I would like to post all the details about the work we are doing with the porters, for political reasons I don't feel comfortable doing so at this time. I'm becoming more and more aware of the difference between working with this organization and working somewhere like Amani. When you help street children, you bring in money and assistance that was never there in the first place, so everyone is happy; however, when you advocate for human rights in the workplace, the money is already there, it's just the division of it that changes. This shift in the balance of power and money can make people pretty upset, and unfortunately for us, these upset people are usually powerful people with powerful friends. That's all I can really say for now, but one day when I'm safely back in America I look forward to giving you all more details than you probably ever wanted to know.

Aside from all of that, there is some sad news to report from the Hippensteel/Drummond family. A couple of weeks ago, my "other grandmother" Snookie was taken to the hospital. A few days later they discovered she had cancer, and a few days after that she peacefully passed away. Although it was quite shocking to everyone and it has been difficult to be away from my family during this time, I think we are thankful that she was not in prolonged pain and that she was able to "go home" in peace. I was very thankful to be able to see the funeral via Skype. We will always remember Snookie's chocolate chip cookies, chocolate cake, colorful style, Christmas tree decorations, and crossword puzzles. We will miss you Snookie, but we know you danced all the way to heaven.