I’ve done a bit of traveling this month, first to a lake near the Kenyan border and then to Zanzibar which is a beautiful island off the coast. Both trips were lots of fun, and it was great to spend time with friends.
Although it has been a good month, it’s been one filled with goodbyes.
First to my family. Although I was ready to be back to my normal life here, it wasn’t easy to say goodbye after such a sad holiday.
Then to Andrew, the art teacher at Amani, who finished his time here last week. He helped the kids at Amani start doing art that wasn’t just tracing or copying something someone else had drawn out of a book. He taught them to think creatively, and it was really amazing to see some of the projects they created through his lessons.
Then yesterday, Susan, the health volunteer at Amani and my best friend in Tanzania, went home. I will miss her more than words can say, and so will the babies.
About a week ago, 12 new kids arrived at Amani on the same day. It was great to see a few old faces and lots of new ones. And it was even greater to see hungry bellies getting full, dirty clothes getting washed, and little tired bodies getting rest. It was a bit daunting to walk into the Starters classroom the next day. Overnight, 15 students had become 27. At the same time, what a privilege it was to be a part of providing structure and love to these children (ranging in ages 8-15) who, until the previous day, had been sleeping on the streets.
Amani has what they call an “open door” policy, which mostly means that they will never turn away a child due to lack of space or supplies. This was very evident during my first two trips here when 90+ kids were sleeping in a 2-bedroom house every night. But the open door policy also means that kids will never be held at Amani against their will. If a child wants to leave, they are allowed to go.
It often seems crazy to us, looking at things with our grown-up, comfortable, always-had-a-bed and raised-in-a-loving-home selves. We see the kids living on the streets. They’re dirty, hungry, and often abused. And then we see the kids at Amani. They’re well-fed, well-clothed, and cared for. And, for us, it’s easy to discern the better option.
But for a street child, things look a little different. On the streets, they can make money. They can do what they want to do when they want to do it. There are no rules, no bedtimes, no chores.
And so, many times, when kids first arrive at Amani, it’s quite an adjustment. Suddenly, they’re supposed to be in school all day. They have to listen to the caregivers, they have to help with the cleaning, they have to go to bed at 9 and get up at 5. They can’t use drugs or hit anybody.
Oftentimes, this transition is quite difficult. Which is why, in many ways, the “open door” policy is a beautiful thing. Lots of times, children will arrive from the streets, check things out, and go back to the streets a few days later. After a couple of weeks, they might come back and decide to stay for good. And although it’s so, so very hard to see them go and upsetting to the dynamic of everything for the staff and for the other kids, it’s extremely important that the kids are able to leave. It’s a big decision for a child to leave the streets, and it’s very important that they’re the ones to make it.
Like I said, last week 12 new kids arrived at Amani. When we returned from Zanzibar on Tuesday, 19 were gone. Most of them were the new kids, but some had been at Amani for months, and some for even years. They were kids we had loved, played with, talked to, and taught. 19 empty beds. 19 empty desks. It’s very surreal. I wonder, what are they doing? I wonder, what were they thinking? I wonder, what could we have done better?
To be honest, I’m a little tired of saying goodbye. It’s just not very fun.
But I think I’m realizing that, the only time saying goodbye isn't fun is when you're saying it to people you love. And I’m lucky to be around lots of people who are very loveable.
And I hope that the ones that we’ve said goodbye to, especially those who don’t have a place to sleep tonight, will remember the love that we’ve shown them. And that they will decide to come home soon. The door is open.
Please pray for these kids who have left:
